Saturday 26 January 2013

The hardest questions I'll never be able answer.

Monkey has been dealing well with the changes in his little life. He's young enough to roll with the punches but aware enough to ask the hard questions. I'm going to list some of them. I answer him as honestly as I can and sometimes the only answer I have is "I don't know."

If you're going through this and your nearly 5 year old isn't quite as eloquent as Monkey, these questions may be there but unasked...

  1. Why couldn't you stop loving Daddy first? Then I would stay here with Daddy and see you on weekends.
  2. If a family loves each other no matter what, why did Daddy stop loving you? You're his family.
  3. Will I ever be in a real family again?
  4. Will you stop loving me? Will Daddy?
  5. Why can't we just live next door to Daddy?
  6. Can't you make it all go back to the way it was?
  7. Why?
  8. What did you do to make this happen? Why can't you fix it?
  9. Love is forever, isn't it?
  10. Why does *insert friend's name* daddy still love her mum?
  11. When can I live with Daddy and just visit you?
  12. If I have two homes now, will I always have two homes? Even when I'm a grown up?
  13. Will I love someone when I'm big and have it be forever? 
  14. I don't want to have a person I love. I might have to leave them and hurt them and the children.
  15. Why can't I remember how to be happy all the time? Why do I feel funny and sad so much?


  1. Oh hun I have no words. Thinking of you

  2. Oh Cyndi Im feel so much for the 2 of you
    probably coz Ive been there

    just keep reminding him love him
    try not to take it too personally
    when he talks about wanting to live with his dad and only see you in the weekends I know that hurts
    take one day at a time I do
    HUGS and many prayers xoxo

  3. what difficult questions you are faced with. Can I say though clearly he feels incredibly safe with you to ask such big questions xxxx

  4. He is just too clever. it must hurt so much, especially when he asks things that sound mean, but are just his thoughts.

  5. He is just too clever. it must hurt so much, especially when he asks things that sound mean, but are just his thoughts.

  6. Big hugs to you. I've been on the other side of a marriage break-up. I was the child - a bit older than your son (I was 10) and it's such a confusing time. And so hard to think beyond yourself and what it's doing to you (as the child). But I can only begin to imagine how difficult it is for you to try and answer those questions. Take care.

  7. Oh man... that Is so sad. For him, and for you too ((huge hugs))
    I really feel for you having to deal with all of this xxx much love xxx


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