Sunday, 21 December 2014

Musical meandering

I'm finding it hard to choose the right words recently. The ones I find seem sluggish and stale. Overused and ugly. But lyrics still get me... I still feel them running under my skin even when I'm so tightly wound that I feel like I could snap. I'm always grateful for the borrowed words and more easily captured emotions. They become more tangible. More manageable.

 





Tell me the words you long to hear
And I'll sing them loud and clear
Let me heal the wounds you've held on to for all these years
Break the cycle
Break the chains
'Cause love is louder than all your pain
Than all your pain

Tuesday, 16 December 2014

twelve years ago, under African sun,
I sweated under layers of fabric,
not quite white, I wasn't one to lie,
I sweated under the layers of responsibility
and the layers of shoulds, coulds and woulds

two years ago, under African rain,
I danced in the puddles,
flowers in my hair,
I sweated under the layers of responsibility
and the layers of shoulds, coulds and woulds

twelve hours ago, under timed lights,
I sweated under the pressure of trying to sink the ball,
laughing til I cried at crude jokes,
scattered amongst serious discussions on patriarchy
and the layers of shoulds, coulds and woulds
seemed to become what ifs...

Sunday, 7 December 2014

Southerly

it blew straight down the white line,
a southerly, biting through the should-be-summer sun
wrapped itself around them, drawing them closer
shorts and t-shirts, not enough to keep them warm
a summer time matchmaker, he took her in his arms
waiting for the bus home from the beach
watching the wind blow the sand down the street
feeling her warmth against his chest,
pulling him into the present
the cold on his back a reminder of winter
and the loneliness of it.

Sunday, 30 November 2014

Bullshit Diet - poem

Spoon by spoon they fed her the words
small snippets of truth wrapped in white lies
they waited for her to believe the words
to just swallow them, to let them become part of her

but she couldn't because she was on a diet.

Wednesday, 26 November 2014

In Memory of Asphalt

Especially in the heat of the rocks and the breaking of the waves.
And in the sway of the ships at dock, and the sound of wheels on asphalt.
In the smell of coffee and cut grass, you are there.
Your voice echoes in the empty moments of my day
Those moments when I forget to forget you
Especially in the taste of sweat and salt
In the heat of the rocks and the sound of wheels on asphalt
You're more than a memory.




in the bones

You said I speak with my hands
but
syllabic metacarpals
phonetic phalanges
are still
mute in movement
muzzled without your insight
into what I've left unsaid
in word and gesture.

Saturday, 22 November 2014

Muscle Memory

Muscle memory

Push me down and gratefully
Weigh me down with words
Touch my soul with your eyes
Bury yourself in my body
Trace your name under my skin
Whisper mine to my bones
Break my heart as I broke yours
As once again, I commit you to memory.

Sunday, 16 November 2014

Blinks

the cursor blinks
waiting for the words to fill the void
the white screen waits for characters in a myriad of colours 
fingers are poised to start
and fall onto the keys
typing word after word
a love song
a tirade
a rant
only to be
backspaced
or selected and deleted
because they don't fit
they don't fill the void the way they should
they can't fill the hole
so the cursor blinks
waiting
waiting 
waiting
until
the screen fades and the words are never said
never shared because if they're too hard to type
maybe, possibly, they're too hard to read or hear

You were right



Wednesday, 12 November 2014

Conversations

We've had this conversation before
I'm sure I've heard these words
I've seen your face, your smile fade
Your lip curl into that look of distaste
I've felt my stomach drop and the bile rise
As your anger falls on me.

We've had this conversation before.
I'm sure I've heard these words
I've seen your face, your smile grow
As your lip curls and your dimple shows
I've felt my stomach drop and the butterflies rise
As your love embraces me

We've had these conversations before.
I'm sure I've heard these words in my head.