Tuesday 11 June 2013

A dose of hugs...

I am a hugger. If you know me in the real world, you know that. Well, if you know me now, in the real world, I am a hugger. I am freer with my hugs and, trust me on this one, I have probably wanted to hug you at some stage and held myself back for fear of crossing some boundary or other.

There is something magical about a hug. They can be reassuring. They can be uplifting. They can be welcoming. They can be an apology. They can be a promise of more to come. They can put you at your ease. They can help you feel connected to the wider world. They can let you feel like you're helping someone else.

I prefer to hug people I know... but I've hugged strangers when I've been moved too, and not just the ones holding the "Free Hugs" sign! 

Hugs are my favourite medicine... when things were bad after Monkey was born, there weren't enough hugs available and I turned to edible hugs. The kind that are chocolatey or sticky and gooey and make you feel loved... They also make you feel guilty, ugly and less than worthy.

Now, I'm finding it easier to not cave and step into the quagmire that is eating my emotions. It's easier because I have friends who are huggers. Friends who are free with their hugs. I have a BF who gives perfect hugs. I have other friends who can be relied on to give hugs when I least realise I need one. I honestly have no idea how they know.

Hugs affect your physiology - they lower stress, raise oxytocin levels and some studies have shown that they improve your immune system.

(Tangent - I find hugging a guy in an emotional moment is more reassuring than hugging a woman. I'm not sure why that is. It might be that I calm myself a little so that I don't drench the poor man in my tears or it might be that their hugs are, by the nature of their physique, harder or firmer? A proper hug from one of my guy friends can change my day (esp from the BF!!). But hugs from my girl friends are as good in a different way... Am I the only one who finds them different?)

A proper hug is hard to define as it varies from person to person... But trust me if you make the effort to hug someone, you're helping and are a great hugger... Unless you grab ass at the same time - then you're on the naughty list.

The Official Hug Guide


Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I try to reply to as many as I can either here or by email. <3 LJx