Wednesday 18 May 2011

Too Sexy, Too Soon - Not just for girls!

Have a read of the article above. Wait, actually, make a cup of coffee first, get a slice of cake, you're going to need something to spit on the keyboard in indignation/shock/horror etc.

My biggest concern of the entire article is the fact that there needs to be this kind of article. That there are products to prompt an article like this. That (sadly) marketing and product placement type peeps can make a huge amount of money off the insecurities of mothers.

I am not the mother of a girl. I am not the most self confident person, I know, I have body issues etc. But I am doing my damnedest not to let that rub off on Monkey. I am encouraging him to be active, I am trying to be more active, we eat mostly healthily and I hope this is enough.

I can't imagine what it's like to be the mother of girls. It must be hard. How do you filter the outside influences?

Just as I was about to post this the universe knocked:

Last night I read this article and discovered femiman, the new "it" look for male models. I don't think the cover should have been censored it's purely for sensation. 

I have nothing against the model. He is beautiful. He is doing his job. I hope he didn't get the crap beaten out of him in high school - he would have at mine. He is successful but wow... how do I/you approach this with our boys who are increasingly insecure and reliant on magazines to represent masculinity. (sounds similar to the plight of mums with girls looking at supermodels in magazines)

Here is a photo of him from The Daily Mail and while you are looking at it and marvelling at his beauty, please have a thought as to what this means for our boys. 

Monkey is young now, but soon he will be looking outside our immediate circle for inspiration, norms and acceptance. How do I go about grounding him in reality? I want to tell him his body is awesome, he is handsome but then I worry that he will pick up that appearance is important. So I try to stress what his body does well, and then I worry that he will think that I am picking up on that due to the fact that he isn't handsome etc... Arrgggh!


  1. articles like that remind me of this video:

    (warning: NSFW/NSFK - language)

    I think it's a bit easier here in NZ because that culture hasn't rubbed off *as much* it's still possible to find little girl clothes and keep them as little girls. But the evilness is fast encroaching.

    I find myself even keeping my daughter away from regular tv commercials that tell us we need the "ab-circle pro" and anti pimple, anti aging cream. She's only 5, and because of those commercials, she thinks I need both.

    My hubby insists that media are trying to de-testosterone males, too. He hates it.

  2. I don't get the problem, to be honest. Surely it's good that this model is showing that men *don't* have to be all testosterone and body hair to be men? I know a lot of men who would have loved to have seen this growing up because it would have shown them that they weren't totally abnormal for wanting to be more feminine.


  3. I read this last night and wanted to comment then...but HAD to sleep. So here I am.
    I think it all applies to boys, in my growing up life I have know a few boys that struggled with image and self-esteem...granted, these boys turned out to be gay..but they are still men....In regards to my feelings about it and raising my lads....With Neo I use the same positive reinforcement techniques I use for behaviour...for example instead of just saying "you are a good boy"...being more specific like "you have been a very polite boy toda..." or "You sat so well at the table.." so I try the same with image "I love your big blue eyes, they are so lovely and so very good for seeing with!"...and "I love how tall you are...when your older you can get stuff off the top shelf for your mum"...if you get me...sometimes its hard to think of you have to be quite creative...something you are not lacking in! Im not sure if this will work...but it works for now so I am rolling with it!!!


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