Wednesday 14 September 2011

Just being enough Pt1

Usual Disclaimer applies - don't read if easily offended, easily worried, easily pissed off etc etc...

Growing up I don't think I was ever aware of being enough. I was very often too much of something. Often they would contradict each other but they still applied. I wonder now, if knowing then that I was enough it would have changed the way I see myself.

From my earliest memories I was/am:

Too quiet
Too reserved/shy 
Too clever to be getting below 90%
Too good at public speaking - I was too good at talking in public so I narrated every nativity play from the time I was eight. Never did get to be Mary.
Too noisy.
Too demanding
Too selfish
Too secretive
Too worried about protecting my mum
Too easily embarrassed
Too fat
Too day-dreamy
Too friendly
Too ready to trust my gut feelings
Too judgmental

By the time I reached university I could add:

Too good at languages to be able to be a mediocre student
Too easy 
Too argumentative
Too challenging
Too loud
Too inquiring
Too insecure
Too easily embarrassed
Too fat
Too concerned about not hurting others or worrying them

Now I am
Too worried about Monkey
Too free-range
Too determined to do a good job of motherhood
Too intimidating
Too much of a pushover
Too caring
Too open
Too sharing
Too selfish
Too untidy
Too ungrateful
Too helicopter-mum
Too demanding of my husband
Too lax with my friendships
Too strict
Too flexible
Too rigid
Too loud
Too stubborn
Too concerned with what other people think
Too focused on the negative
Too far away.

Anyone reading this know me from way back then? Got anything to add?

Now to work on being. enough.


  1. Oh my goodness--I love this. So honest, so you. Thank you so much for linking up with JBE!

  2. a transparent list for sure, and such a look inside you to let others know who you are. so glad you linked up!!


Thank you for taking the time to read and comment. I try to reply to as many as I can either here or by email. <3 LJx